Where do you go after
you’ve swept up a dusty decade?
Voices of memories, dialogues of decisions
glinting pieces of effort,
shambled shards of mixed failures and gritty grains
of overcoming the odds. The minutes after
the disposal of what was,
a pause before, you’ve put away the broom.
Clean floor, the past no longer felt
between your toes.
In the dark kitchen while all lay asleep
I stood shorter than the countertop
determined to throw away my blanket of comfort
self worn to soft holding of me.
The mouth of the garbage can
that lived under the sink
hungry for layers of softness
swallowed them down easily.
My four year old self threw away weakness
like an explorer sailing to uncharted seas
I declared myself ready for the mystery of the grown up.
Without need for a fall back into security
how sure I was of my power to leave the shore
of my dearly loved comfort layer.
Where did the urgency come from
to stop leaning
depending on
go it alone without reliance?
Years later in my cold bed determined and proud
still I wonder why I needed to prove my toughness
hurry away from childhood.
© Alicia Grimshaw 2018
At the station, the train of life only pauses
our illusion of control blankets nature’s causes.
Nights to days shift, and the engineer steers
rhythm of the planet moves through the years.
Cycle of no endings, wheels freely spin
untouchable by human error, solstice arrives again.
© Alicia Grimshaw 2018
Your phrases landed on the floor
between us. I didn’t know how to catch them.
Strings of words, a story of near miss.
One collection of minutes that almost
restructured my life, like petals
blown away by the wind
never again to unite in beauty.
A reminder of the impermanence of us.
© Alicia Grimshaw 2017
flashlight batteries - Ali Grimshaw 