
When you’re begging for peace …


I have many fears. They have pushed me to the edge and stretched me beyond where I thought I would break. But I am still here and have developed a fascination with what I can learn from them. Fear can be like a monster inside of you, holding you hostage. Sharing your fear with another can take the power away from this monster. I have found that when I bring my monster into the light it is often hairy but not so scary. This is a place for you to break free from that monster by describing your fear and leaving it behind on this page. You will never find out what this is like if you don’t take action. Start with one of your smaller monsters and leave it here.
This is also an experiment in learning from each other. What do we fear? Will our fears be similar or very different? I am interested to see what we all have in common. Get curious about your fear and leave it behind. A couple of sentences or a picture will do.
Please don’t comment on another’s monster. This might force them to jump from the page.
I will start the sharing with one of my fear monsters. The fear of suffocating. This monster can take my confidence away when I am occupying a small, enclosed space. Sometimes I feel like I can’t breathe. I panic. I have learned to talk myself through this and it is slowly getting easier over time.
What a perfect time of year to give your monster a place to hang out with others. It can make friends and may end up so happy that it doesn’t come back to you and even if it does, it might not look the same to you as it did before.
Thanks for sharing. Let the Monster Bash begin.
Ali
Today I am feeling grateful to Poetry Breakfast for sharing two of my poems this month. The first, Procrastinator’s List, was posted today. Thank you for sharing my light. Everyone has a light that matters. Some us us lose our batteries along the way and need help getting new ones, others need to get their batteries recharged. Writing is a powerful way to recharge. If you are interested in exploring the gift of shared writing please leave me a message.
May your light shine.
Ali
Head down, back bent,
climbing back into yourself
fear perspiring on your forehead.
Looks like you could use a lift.
Travel forward with me
I will steer for awhile.
You can coast.
I will pedal out the questions.
You can consider answers.
Life can be different
on a bicycle built for two.
© Ali Grimshaw

Despair for the moment to come
willing my body to enter the room
a mountain of mortification on my back
facing those faces
being seen while craving camouflage.
Owning the me that showed up today
failure and intention,
with a disappointing lack of action.
While seeking an empty seat I am
investigating the ability to shed my skin,
to start fresh. Becoming
a blank slate that holds
not a bit of old chalk dust.
© Ali Grimshaw

She could think about something else
a distraction from the pain
another new form of an old approach,
all temporary fixes,
that will return her to the same spot in the maze.
Unfortunately familiar torment.
Hands clenched to aching,
nails biting skin,
jaw clenched.
Her body’s defiance to the status quo.
Suffering unnoticed by a hurried world.
“Not this time.” She whispers. “This time
I will make my own exit.”
© Alicia Grimshaw 2016
The quiet between us
like floating icebergs
tongues frostbit into stillness
is it that we have forgotten what to say
misplaced our formula to speak,
a habitual slow retreat to safety?
“What are you thinking about?”
“Nothing.”
I am uncertain how to start the
defrost cycle.
© Ali Grimshaw