I am in the trough between crests of fear a briefness then surprise I let another wave pass through me after the cold slap initial sting, I realize I am still here It is unexpected knowing my history of being pulled under Now I tread my legs strongly sure lift my face skyward with dare ©Ali Grimshaw 2021
Let’s change the way we talk about depression and suicide. Here is a link to the full article Why mental health advocates use the words ‘died by suicide’, from which these valuable points were gathered.
Please use “died by suicide,” instead of “committed suicide,” as it removes culpability from the person who has lost their life and allows a discussion about the disease or disorder from which they were suffering. Let’s move away from blame toward compassionate language.
Not everyone who suffers from depression will have suicidal thoughts. And not everyone who has suicidal thoughts will act on them.
“Speak with your loved one about how they are feeling and encourage help-seeking by way of the many resources available, including the American Association for Suicide Prevention and American Association of Suicidology.
Be direct in your conversations. Dr. Klich finds that because suicide is so stigmatized (and also, just a really tough thing to talk about), people tend to skirt around the issue, or even unintentionally steer victims of suicidal thoughts toward a reassuring answer.
Confidential support is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week by way of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-TALK)
flashlight batteries - Ali Grimshaw 
The poem is filled with hope which a lot of people with suicide ideation, unfortunately, don’t have. Lovely, Ali!
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Thank you,Susi. I appreciate your positive response.
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You’re welcome, Ali!
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Wonderful poem. I did a mental health first aid course recently, and we were told the same things – don’t use euphemisms, and ask questions directly.
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Thank you for your supportive response. Together we can change the conversation around mental health. No one should feel shame for being depressed.
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Thank you for this Ali 💛🙏💛
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Thank you for reading. There are so many who deserve our compassion.
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This stood out for me: “knowing my history of being pulled under.” I relate to this, as I battle depression and that’s exactly what it feels like. And sometimes you don’t even know it’s happening. Thank you for your poem and commentary.
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It means so much to hear that you felt understood by the message of my poem. Depression can be very isolating. I hope that you reach out for support. There are people who are compassionate about your experience. I am one of them.
Take good care.
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It is a choice each day to not totally submit to the downward pulling wave. and finding a strong standpoint by looking up.. this is powerful imagery.
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Thank you for letting me know that my poem reached you today. The downward pull can feel so strong. Keep sharing your voice.
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You too.. its a strong reminder so many of us undergo this.. in sharing we are stronger ❤
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You ARE strong, you ARE still here… I AM strong, I AM still here.
Thank you for the inspiration.
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Thank you for the acknowledgement of my words. I am so glad you are here. We can be compassionate listeners for others who are struggling in the darkness.
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This is so beautiful and important ❤️.
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Thank you for valuing what I have shared. There are so many people who struggle with depression alone. My heart is reaching out to them. Please share if you know of someone.
Thank you,
Ali
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a briefness
then surprise
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Thank you friend ❤️❤️❤️
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Powerful metaphor/imagery – “after the cold slap / initial sting, I realize / I am still here”. Can only imagine how it would feel to choose death and then find it had not “taken me”. I CAN imagine choosing death – for many reasons – though I’ve never (yet?) come close to such.
Thanks for the link. I have been on the wondering-why end of another’s choice to check out. My perspective is that such a choice is courageous; perhaps wise; absolutely beyond any other’s full understanding – thus we owe the one gone nonjudgmental respect.
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Jazz,
Thank you so much for your compassionate response to my poem and message regarding the judgment around suicide. All I know is that I don’t know what others experience. I believe that the shame around mental illness keeps us from being able to talk about what we experience and this creates more isolation. I am sorry to hear of your loss. It is understandable that you are wondering what was going on for this person. Losing someone you can about is always difficult. I am sending you love. Thank you for caring.
Ali
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Ali, thank you for this. The poem and the request to change the way we use language around depression. We, as a society, also do not address anxiety well either. It is as pervasive and disabling by itself and even more so as a partner in major depression. 🙁
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Thank you Carrie. The way we speak creates our reality and the possibilities before us. Thank you for listening and valuing new ways to speak about mental health.
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